


not with haste

by IllyriatheSmurf7



Category: The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV)
Genre: F/F, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Smut, Tenderness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 16:29:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28531497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IllyriatheSmurf7/pseuds/IllyriatheSmurf7
Summary: Dani is looking at her with a tenderness Jamie isn’t used to, something she isn’t equipped to handle. She knows how to be smooth, flirting, how to make a woman want her bad enough to relinquish all control to her. But it’s a game, a carefully crafted game she learned how to play after years of trial and error.There is no playing here, and the honesty in Dani’s eyes is so disarming to leave Jamie completely vulnerable, at the mercy of feelings that run far too deep already, for the short time they’ve known each other.(Or, what happens after the moonflower monologue.)
Relationships: Dani Clayton & Jamie, Dani Clayton/Jamie
Comments: 77
Kudos: 401





	not with haste

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! So, this happened. What was meant to be a short one-shot about Dani and Jamie’s first time is now a 10k beast that I poured. This is a new fandom for me, so many might not know me, but who does is familiar with my tendency to let my stories get away from me because of all the feelings I pour into them. Dani and Jamie have captured my heart, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about them since I finished the show and this is the result. I plan on writing more for them, possibly a series of prompts, but for now, I hope you enjoy this first story. If you read, I’d love to hear your thoughts/feelings!
> 
> Enjoy <3

Dani kisses her.

Jamie sees it coming the moment Dani’s hands grip her jacket and her blue eyes lock with hers, lingering, before drifting down to her lips. And yet, she wasn’t expecting it.

Hoping it, yes. Imagining it, again and again since that first beautiful, disastrous kiss they had shared. Not expecting it, though. She wasn’t expecting anything from Dani when she had decided to take her to her secret place.

Even that choice had not originated with any real, romantic intent. There was nothing about her ugly past that Jamie believed could inspire a fit of romance or passion. But sharing it meant making herself vulnerable, baring her wounds and trusting Dani wouldn’t use them against her, or open new ones. She couldn’t think of a greater proof of commitment, the wild throbbing of her heart in her chest as she set about starting her tale a reminder of how far gone she was already, too far gone to pretend she didn’t care.

It was too late to not be hurt, too late to guard her heart, like she had learned to do after years of misplacing her trust and being on the receiving end of the worst people had to offer. The moment they had stepped into the clearing Jamie had known that a rejection would burn her worse than the scalding water that had scarred her skin forever. 

And even knowing it, she would ask nothing of Dani. Nothing, if not to listen and stop punishing herself.

But Dani doesn’t just listen. She grabs her and kisses her and when she pulls back, there is no anguish on her face, no fear to startle her away and leave Jamie alone to wonder what it was that she did wrong. Dani just smiles, sighing against Jamie’s lips and resting her forehead against Jamie’s, and in that tiny, banal gesture of affection, Jamie feels months of painful, exhausting tension melt away from Dani’s body. 

Then, her mouth is on Jamie’s again, hot and open and craving, and there is only relief.

They stand in the drizzle until every part of their bodies that isn’t pressed together is chilling and shivering, but Dani’s lips glide against hers and her tongue is in her mouth and Jamie would gladlyget sick in the cold if it meant never pulling away from Dani. She isn’t sure how she is supposed to do it when Dani is whimpering into her mouth and scratching at the back of her neck to tug her closer, closer than physically possible.

She forces herself to finally break the kiss when Dani’s hand grasps the fabric of her shirt and untucks it from her pants.

“Wait,” she huffs out with a small laugh. Dani immediately pulls her hands away and stumbles back, panting heavily.

“Sorry, I’m sorry.”

Her lips are parted and flushed, her gaze dark, black pupils with a clear, blue ring surrounding them. She is trembling, in the same way Jamie knows she is too, the strain of keeping from falling into each other’s arms again. She is the prettiest thing Jamie has ever seen, ever touched.

“I’m sorry,” Dani babbles again. “That- that wasn’t right. I didn’t ask, I should have. Maybe you’re still—”

Jamie cups her face and shuts her up with a deep kiss, lingering against Dani’s lips until she feels her melt against her body.

“Relax,” she says with a smile after pulling away again. “You did nothing wrong. Thought it was pretty clear that I’m on board with this.” She traces Dani’s cheek with her thumb, feeling a flutter in her stomach at the way Dani leans into her touch. “Definitely on board,” she whispers.

“I know I messed things up last time,” Dani says. Her hand clutches at Jamie’s jacket, gripping the fabric like she is afraid Jamie is going to slip away from her. “But I like you. I really do. And the thing that was holding me back, I—” She frowns, shaking her head as if trying to forcefully shove a thought out of her mind. Her eyes brim with determination when she sets them on Jamie again. “I don’t know if it’s gone, but I want it to be. I don’t want it to stop me anymore.”

Even in the biting chill of the night air, Jamie feels a warmth settle deep in her chest. The dark shelters her, enables the heat to rise to her cheeks and ears unseen. 

_I like you_. 

She is stuck on those words like a kid dealing with her first crush. For once, she lets herself bask in that child-like excitement. It was denied to her when she was actually a kid, and as she grew up, she quickly learned to deny it to herself.

There is none of that worry now, none of that restraint. There is just Dani, looking at her with her bright eyes glimmering in the moonlight. They speak the truth of what she told Jamie even more than her words did.

_I like you._

She smiles. Cannot do otherwise. She lets the smile stretch across her face without doing anything to stifle it, and when Dani smiles back at her, Jamie leans in and kisses her again. It’s soft this time, unhurried, like the happiness she feels growing deep within her, the type of serene happiness that threatens to take root. 

“Let’s head back,” she whispers against Dani’s lips. A low chuckle rumbles at the back of her throat with the small frown that appears on Dani’s face. She nods at the clearing around them. “Nothing sexy about hypothermia.”

The crease on her forehead disappears and Dani laughs. It’s gentle, like she is.

They walk back with their hands intertwined, stopping more often than not to kiss and kiss again. Every time Jamie indulges, she means to do so quickly, but every single time she yields to the pull of Dani’s mouth.

Her lips are tingling by the time they are back to the manor. The imposing shape of the building re-appears through the mist much sooner than Jamie would have liked, and the most greedy, hungry part of her demands she slows them down, press Dani against a tree, against the bonnet of her car even, and set both ablaze with her hands and mouth on every inch of soft skin she can reach.

She forcefully silences that part, locks it down and accepts the deep, aching throb that builds at the pit of her stomach as a result.

It only grows more intense once they stand by the front door. Jamie stuffs her hands in her pockets, fidgeting awkwardly as Dani fiddles with the keys and opens the huge door. Heat seeps through from the inside, cosy and inviting, making what Jamie resolved to do only more difficult.

“I should… I should go,” she says weakly. There isn’t an ounce of conviction in her voice. “Let you rest and all.”

Dani’s lovely smile wavers and dies down, replaced by a sad expression that immediately makes Jamie regret her words.

“Oh,” Dani whispers, her voice dripping disappointment. “You want to go?”

“S’the last thing I want, really. I just, uh…” Jamie lets out a nervous chuckle, shaking her head. She fixes her eyes on the tip of her shoe. It takes her a moment to build enough courage to look up and meet Dani’s gaze. “Don’t wanna ruin things.”

“You couldn’t.”

Dani is looking at her with a tenderness Jamie isn’t used to, something she isn’t equipped to handle. She knows how to be smooth, flirting, how to make a woman want her bad enough to relinquish all control to her. But it’s a game, a carefully crafted game she learned how to play after years of trial and error. 

There is no playing here, and the honesty in Dani’s eyes is so disarming to leave Jamie completely vulnerable, at the mercy of feelings that run far too deep already, for the short time they’ve known each other.

“Last time I rushed it, and—”

“Last time _I_ rushed it,” Dani interrupts her. “But now it’s different. I know what I want.” She steps closer, so close that Jamie can see the bobbing of her throat as she gulps down nervously. Still, her voice doesn’t shake. “And I don’t feel guilty about wanting it.”

Dani’s hand is hesitant when it reaches for Jamie’s, her thumb rubbing softly across her knuckles. It reminds Jamie of another night, only a few nights ago. A similar soft, hesitant touch, communicating in a way words couldn’t. This time, it carries no angst or tension. 

It’s a gentle, urgent request, and Jamie has no power or will to resist.

“Stay.”

* * *

The first time Jamie had sex she was fifteen. She walked up to the popular, handsome jock whose friends would bully her on a daily basis, and six hours later they were having sex on the backseat of his car. After two days, everyone at school knew about it, exactly the result she was aiming for when she picked a guy like him. Years into foster care, trying to make herself invisible at home to avoid her foster parents and big and tough at school to discourage the bullies, she had learned how to recognize danger and what to do to protect herself. And it hadn’t taken her long to realize that being called a whore was far less dangerous than being called a dyke.

The first time she had sex with a woman she was seventeen. She was older than Jamie, confident and magnetic and so unlike anything Jamie had been used to. Better, even with how uncaring she could be, how belittling. She was young and with no experience so she told herself it was okay, told herself it was love and complied to all her demands, even the ones she wasn’t comfortable with. It took her years with Tamara to understand just how not okay it really was. 

Since then, sex lost all the heaviness of her first times. It became fun, and thrilling, something she could crave. Something she was good at. 

Always in control, though. Even during a reversal of roles, her surrender would only be partial, carefully calculated. Always knowing what she was getting herself into because she would never be fragile and breakable again. Always in control.

But as she finds herself pressed against the door of Dani’s bedroom, a hot mouth kissing her senselessly and eager hands grasping and tugging at her body wherever they can reach, one thing becomes rapidly clear in Jamie’s mind. Her heart is beating far too fast for any pretense of control. And for the first time in her life, she wouldn’t want it any other way.

She responds to every kiss with the same intensity, wrapping a hand around the nape of Dani’s neck and splaying the other across her back over her sweater. Dani had stripped them of their jackets as soon as they had walked inside the room, right before pinning Jamie against the wooden door. It had made Jamie laugh, that sudden boldness, but the sound had quickly melted into a whimper when she had felt the sting of Dani’s teeth on her bottom lip.

When Dani does the same thing she had done outside, untucks her shirt from her pants and presses her hands on the small of her back, Jamie doesn’t stop her this time. She couldn’t, not with how Dani’s palms burn against her skin, inviting her to arch off the door and into Dani’s body.

She is familiar with that feverish hunger, both with feeling it and being used to sate it. But Dani is unlike anyone she has ever met, and when she suddenly pulls back, panting heavily through kiss bruised lips, it isn’t just lust Jamie finds in her eyes. It’s a soft, caring gaze, one that Jamie can’t remember ever being on the receiving end of. There is heat, and there is fondness, and the mix is immediately heady.

“Is this— is it okay?” Dani asks. Her voice is hesitant, but her eyes keep dropping to Jamie’s mouth, like it physically pains her not to be kissing her right now.

Jamie answers her and puts an end to her ache at once, tucking a loose strand of blonde hair behind Dani’s ear and closing her mouth around her full, top lip.

They could just be doing this for the rest of the night, stand there and kiss deep and languidly without it ever growing into something more, and Jamie would consider herself the luckiest girl in that boring, cursed land. But above the hot, dizzying feeling of Dani’s body deliciously flush against hers, Jamie becomes aware that she is being tugged forward.

It’s a slow movement at first. Her legs just go along with it instinctively, too distracted by Dani’s tongue flicking against the roof of her mouth and sending shivers all the way down her spine. It’s only when they reach the center of the room and Dani’s hands slide down her chest, shaking as theytease the hem of her shirt, that Jamie truly realizes what is happening.

She reaches down and takes Dani’s hands into her own just as her fingers graze the skin of her stomach.

“You’re sure, yeah?” she whispers against Dani’s lips, pulling back just enough to search her eyes. Dani’s behavior has been bolder than she could have ever imagined, but she still asks. She _has to_ ask, because as much as she tries to hide it, Jamie can see and feel the light tremors that are running through her body, and she won’t risk anything that might make Dani feel uncomfortable.

“Yes. Yes, I am.” Dani breathes out, quickly enough and in such a confident tone that Jamie has no doubt she means it. “Just…”

“What is it?” she asks gently. Dani has that small frown on her face that reveals and conceals her emotions at once, so Jamie waits. As patient as she can be, giving Dani the time she needs to articulate what’s hiding behind that frown.

“I’ve never done this,” she finally blurts out. A bright flush immediately colors her cheeks and she squeezes her eyes shut, as if embarrassed by the sound of her own words. “Not- not like this, not with a—”

“Dani, it’s okay.” She places a chaste kiss on her lips as Dani opens her eyes again. “S’alright, we don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with.”

“I am,” Dani rushes to say. “I am, I- I really want this. I just want to be honest with you, and apart from… You know, with a woman, I’ve never—”

“And that’s okay,” Jamie says, smiling at the notion that that could ever be an issue for her, as if being there and holding Dani in her arms isn’t already more than anything she’d dared hope for. 

“As long as you’re okay, Poppins, I don’t care about anything else.”

The wrung lines of Dani’s face soften and disappear. A smile builds in their place and Jamie feels a gentle warmth simmer low in her belly. Dani is looking at her like no one else but Jamie could give her what she wants, and like she wants to make sure Jamie wants the same thing. Caring even in a moment when she should be cared for. 

Jamie wishes Dani could see just how good of a person she is, how rare it is to be that selfless, that kind, in a world that seems made to kill any instinct toward kindness, and when Dani leans in and rests her forehead against hers, breathing hotly against her lips, Jamie realizes that what she wants from that night more than anything––more than pleasure, more than sex––is to be for Dani who no one ever was for her. To take care of Dani in the way no one ever took care of her.

“We can go slow, okay?” she says, cupping Dani’s face with both hands as the other girl nods. She runs her thumb across her plump lip, feels her shivery breath against it. “As slow as you want. And if you need it, we can stop and—”

“God, I don’t want to stop,” Dani cuts her off and crashes her mouth against Jamie’s.

The unexpected urgency of Dani’s kiss makes Jamie stumble back. Her hands grasp at Dani to keep her balance but the touch only makes the other girl kiss her harder. Dani’s hands steady her, one under her jaw and the other about her hip, fingers pressing and digging with the same searing insistence of her mouth, and whatever thought about holding back Jamie might have had, it dissolves into nothingness, replaced by Dani’s touch and smell and taste.

Their mouths mold together, moving and responding to each other like they spent years doing this. But they haven’t, everything is new and a discovery that makes the coil of pleasure in Jamie’s belly clench tighter. The scratch of Dani’s fingernails on the back of her neck, the small whimpers she lets out whenever their tongues brush together, the soft press of her breasts against Jamie’s after Dani angles her head and deepens the kiss.

Not an inch of them isn’t flush together, it’s only their clothes separating them, offensively so almost. Jamie’s skin is burning underneath her shirt, and she can’t help but sigh into Dani’s mouth when Dani pushes her hands below the fabric and slides them all the way up Jamie’s back, pressing hard in the dip between her shoulder blades.

And then those hands slip down again, grab her shirt and pull. 

The air is cold against Jamie’s blazing skin, triggers shivers and gooseflesh all over her stomach and chest and Jamie could whine with the feeling as much as she could because of the absence of Dani’s hands on her, but the sound dies at the back of her throat when Dani drops her shirt to the floor and tugs off her own sweater and top in one motion.

Her hairband gets stuck in the tight fit of the turtleneck, wavy blonde hair cascades freely over her face and shoulders, and for a moment, Jamie forgets how to breathe.

She stares, cannot help it. Pale skin and curves she told herself not to imagine for weeks, now on display, for her. The red flush atop the swell of Dani’s heaving breasts surpasses every thought and dream she had about this moment.

And then Jamie looks up, and finds Dani’s dark, hooded gaze fixed on her chest. Her core pulses with aching need at the sight, but she is hardly thinking about her own relief. She has never wanted to be inside someone so bad in her life.

Mere inches of distance between them feel unbearable, agonizing even, once Jamie notices the nervous clench and release of Dani’s fingers. _Let go_ , she wants to say to Dani. And _yes_. _Yes, yes,_ to anything Dani might want to ask, do. Jamie would say _yes_ to it all.

She says it with no words at all, taking Dani’s hand and guiding it to her stomach. Her muscles tense and twitch under the skin, Dani’s hesitant touch already far more pleasurable than it should have the right to be. Then there’s the curl of Dani’s fingers around her ribs, slightly more confident, her thumb grazing the underside of her bra, and Jamie’s stomach flips.

“Is this…”

“Yes.”

_Yes._ It’s okay, it’s more than okay.

Dani repeats the movement, just a bit higher, just a bit closer to tender, hardening flesh. An involuntary, delicious torture. Jamie is used to hard and fast, to grabby, greedy hands. She has never been touched like she is something precious.

Before Dani can ask her if what she is doing is okay again, Jamie reaches behind her back and unclasps her bra, letting the garment slide down her arms and fall down.

It’s a sigh of relief the one that escapes her mouth when she guides Dani’s hand to her breast. Skin on skin, leaving them both shuddering. She feels a gentle squeeze and pulls Dani to her, fitting their mouths together as Dani’s hand remains stuck between their bodies, pressed against soft skin and a pounding heart. Jamie has no doubt Dani can feel it under her palm.

They keep kissing even as their hands grow restless, reaching blindly for newly exposed skin. Each touch triggers a small noise, a sigh or a whimper that lives and dies on their lips. The wet warmth of Dani’s mouth is only more addictive because of it, and Jamie cannot stop herself. She tilts Dani’s face and latches her lips onto her neck, kissing it like she had longed to do for weeks.

Dani sounds breathless as Jamie explores her hot skin with her mouth. She kisses and licks and nips, keeping Dani’s writhing body against hers with an arm around her waist, until she finds a spot, right below Dani’s jawline, that triggers a sharp inhale and fingers digging into her hipbone. She smiles against Dani’s skin and busies herself on the sensitive spot, spurred on by the thrumming of Dani’s pulse under her tongue.

Her hands move with a will of their own, tracing a path up and down the soft, strong expanse of Dani’s back. She is utterly conscious of what she is doing, though, when her fingers tease the clasp of Dani’s bra.

“Yes,” Dani gasps, grabbing at Jamie’s shoulders, her arm. “Please, yes.”

The eagerness in her voice shoots straight down to Jamie’s core.

A moment of fumbling, and Dani’s bra joins Jamie’s on the floor.

Jamie pulls back and slows. Just for a second, just to savor the sight of Dani’s breasts, a muted curse on her lips and an aching throb between her legs as she imagines their feel, their taste. She looks up and finds Dani’s eyes almost black, alight, yearning, in a way that moves her body and makes her melt against Jamie, pressing her forehead against hers and parting Jamie’s mouth with her lips and tongue.

Even like this, still standing, still half-clothed, Dani’s body against Jamie’s feels like cool water after being parched for weeks. She is so aware of everywhere they’re touching as they kiss, and so is Dani, Jamie realizes with elation, because her moan blends with Dani’s as their naked breasts finally rub together.

Dani is all curves and softness, nothing like the tense, anxiety-ridden creature Jamie had first met. She is open and pliant to Jamie’s touch, kissing her deeper whenever Jamie moves her hand on a new patch of naked skin.

Shameless, too, and a whine gets stuck in Jamie’s throat when Dani’s hand unexpectedly traces the curve of her ass above her jeans.

“Fuck,” Jamie whispers, her teeth dig into Dani’s bottom lip a little harder than she intended, but she can’t stop herself with how Dani presses her palm firmly and pulls her hips into hers.

It’s a steady, scorching rise of desire. Incontrollable, like everything about that night, that moment. Jamie thought she’d have to be a guiding force, but she can only follow as Dani blindly walks them both to the bed, kissing the whole way.

They fall onto the mattress together, a mess of limbs twining and searching and refusing to separate.

“Fuckin’ hell,” Jamie mutters when she has to pull back to kick off a boot stuck halfway on her foot. It makes Dani laugh.

“Do mine, too,” she says, wiggling her feet, and they both have a fit of giggles when Jamie pulls off Dani’s shoes and socks with the grace of a bull.

“Making it bloody hard to try and be sexy.”

Dani laughs again and it’s such a sweet sound that it immediately draws Jamie back to her lips. 

Trying to kiss while smiling, unable to stop smiling, is a new feeling for Jamie, and the worst part of her can’t help but wonder if she is setting herself up for a world of hurt, because such a wonderful high can only tumble into the deepest low.

But fuck it, she’ll risk it, Jamie thinks when Dani holds her face and deepens the kiss just barely, just enough for her tenderness and warmth to settle deep within Jamie’s bones. She’ll risk it because it’s real and Dani is moving underneath her and her arms are around her and Jamie _wants_. She wants and cannot believe her luck because Dani wants her just the same.

The buckle of Dani’s belt digging into her stomach is enough of a distraction to remind Jamie just how real this all is, with the breaks and hindrances of reality. She pulls back and sits on her haunches, smiling at the way Dani instinctively tilts her head up as if to chase her lips. Jamie’s fingers on Dani’s stomach trace the soft skin until they meet cotton and leather. It’s a question in itself and Dani nods.

“You too.”

Jamie gets rid of her own pants quickly, all but ripping the jeans off of her legs and throwing them on the floor. With Dani, she is much gentler. She takes her time, also because Dani like this, is simply a vision. 

Her golden hair splayed out around her, the flush on her chest, the strip of skin where Dani unbuckled her belt and zipped her pants open while Jamie wasn’t looking. It steers Jamie’s stare lower, down to where the fabric of her underwear is visible. She gulps, hot tension coiling tighter deep in her belly.

She moves her palms over Dani’s clothed thighs, keeps her eyes locked with Dani’s as she lets her fingers slide under the waistband of her pants. There is nothing but desire and heat in her gaze.

Jamie’s pads touch the fabric of her underwear, a temptation against her restraint, but she paces herself and waits, not wanting to overwhelm Dani, even with the wanton impatience she saw in her eyes. She smiles when Dani lifts her hips to help her and finally tugs her pants down her legs and off of her.

The sight knocks the breath out of Jamie’s lungs. Jamie has had plenty of women in her bed, but right now she feels like a schoolgirl who just saw a naked body for the first time. The most beautiful body, she thinks as her eyes take in every inch of Dani like this, spread out and unashamed. Every inch is inviting, every inch demands the type of attention she cannot give only with her stare.

Her eyes meet Dani’s and she realizes they are feeling the exact same need.

“You’re so…”

“Beautiful,” Jamie cuts her off, smiling and caressing Dani’s thigh and side. Having the right and freedom to touch Dani like that leaves her dazed. “That’s you, Poppins.” She takes another heated glance at stiff nipples and the soft thighs she is kneeling between. “So beautiful.”

Danilets out what sounds like a quiet whine and pulls Jamie to her for a deep, languid kiss.

It feels so good Jamie feels dizzy, almost. She can feel every single part of their bodies touching and writhing together. Dani’s breasts pressed against hers, her mouth and tongue even hungrier than they were before. Her hot hands, palming down Jamie’s spine, over her ass and lower where they can reach her thigh, driving Jamie’s hips forward and into her body.

She is the one to whimper when the throbbing, slick flesh of her core presses tight against Dani’s thigh.

Dani’s teeth drag over her lip when Jamie pulls back to put her mouth on Dani’s neck. She kisses the spot she had discovered earlier and Dani’s body jerks. 

Jamie pins her down gently with one hand at her hip, makes her squirm harder with the other, caressing her thigh, stomach, the swell of her breast. Her lips follow the taut tendon of Dani’s neck down to the hollow of her throat. She dips the tip of her tongue there, a quick, selfish flick before she continues lower, but it’s enough to make Dani’s hips rock up sharply and her hands tangle into Jamie’s hair.

“Jamie––” Jamie hears, a breathy moan that makes her center pulse even more achingly. She cups Dani’s breast and wraps her mouth around a straining nipple. “God, fuck.”

Jamie scrunches her eyes shut. Hearing Dani curse––proper, perfect Dani, cursing because of something she is doing to her––is like molten heat swelling and rolling deep in her belly. Her underwear sticks to her, if she were to grind with purpose against Dani’s thigh she would come in no time, so turned on she is.

Dani’s fingers clench and unclench in Jamie’s hair, at the back of her neck, keeping Jamie’s mouth to her heaving chest. It’s a silent demand, more and more desperate with every kiss and nibble and swirl of Jamie’s tongue.

Jamie, too, feels breathless. Her heart races as she moves her hand down Dani’s stomach and then follows with her lips, her tongue. She drags her teeth on the soft swell right below Dani’s navel and her chin grazes damp underwear.

Dani shudders.

“Jamie.”

An urgent pull behind her neck, at her shoulder. Jamie follows and lets Dani pull her back up her body. The hot coil in Jamie’s belly twists tighter because Dani looks positively wrecked, with her lips swollen and her cheeks streaked with an irresistible red. She is a vision of unbridled lust like this, one her dreams could have never even begun to envision.

Jamie kisses her with deliberate slowness, savoring the soft stroke of her tongue against hers.

“Still okay?” she asks when she draws back.

She wants to be careful. Even with Dani naked and arching into her, she doesn’t want to assume anything. She won’t risk anything that might scare Dani off and ruin this, she won’t fuck this up.

But there is no mistaking what Dani needs, not with her knee bending and rubbing against Jamie’s side. Not with her hand stroking down Jamie’s chest and stomach and curling at her hip. She squeezes when Jamie shifts atop her and slides a hand between their bodies, brushing her fingers over the line of her panties.

She presses her forehead to Jamie’s and nods.

“Please,” she pants against Jamie’s lips.

Jamie’s heart hammers against her chest like it wants to burst out. Through the daze of desire and hunger, she still can’t quite believe this is happening.

The cotton of Dani’s underwear is wet when Jamie cups her with her palm. Jamie’s cheeks burn, her walls clench around nothing and she is thankful when Dani pulls her down for a bruising kiss because she needs something to ground her.

Then she slips her hand into Dani’s panties and even Dani’s mouth isn’t enough.

“Dani, fuck––”

That’s all Jamie can stutter out, because Dani is hot and swollen and slick beyond Jamie’s imagination. 

Dani grabs her face and kisses her again, wet and open-mouthed, and they swallow each other’s moan when Jamie tentatively runs her fingers through Dani’s folds.

Another sound escapes from Dani’s throat as Jamie circles her straining, pulsing clit, a breathless whine as hot as the tender flesh Jamie is caressing, and she pushes her hips up, into Jamie’s hand.

She still has her panties on, the fabric feels almost coarse against Jamie’s knuckles compared to the wet silk her fingers are exploring. But stopping to remove them is just not a possibility, not with the way Dani is wrapped around her and shuddering, moving insistently and chasing her pleasure with unashamed avidity.

Jamie would grin at the erotic display caused by her––by _her_ ––if she weren’t feeling so fucking close to falling apart without a single touch to her throbbing center.

She has always loved pleasing her lovers, taking care of them and figuring out what makes them sigh and twitch and cry out.

But touching Dani and feeling her grow wetter and more restless because of what she is doing doesn’t just fuel her pride. Dani whimpers her name like a plea and rakes her fingernails across her back and begs for more with her hips as much as with her voice and touching her is pleasure in itself.

Jamie could do it forever. Just this, kiss Dani and touch her for as long as Dani wants, needs.

It doesn’t take her long to realize what Dani responds to. Jamie strokes her with purpose, then, steady, tight circles that make Dani screw her eyes shut and gasp like she is out of breath. Jamie smiles and kisses the corner of her mouth, soothing with her lips as her fingers work to undo her.

_So good_ , she mouths against Dani’s cheek. There is no sound to her words but Dani whimpers like she heard her.

Jamie was in no rush, no rush at all to end this and edge Dani to the point of no return. But as she moves her fingers lower to feel Dani differently, deeply, Dani suddenly clings to her and lets out a noise of pure desperation.

“No, don’t–– don’t––”

Jamie rushes back to what she was doing, staring wide-eyed as Dani quakes and almost keens under her touch. 

Dani’s hand tightens in Jamie’s curls, her thighs tense in a telltale way, but Jamie is still not ready for the moment Dani’s entire body jolts and spasms, for the broken, high-pitched moan that pushes out of her throat. 

Dani keeps shaking for long moments, drowns against Jamie’s lips the little, breathy sounds that keep escaping her mouth. Jamie can only kiss her back, in disbelief, and completely soaked. 

There’s no doubt about what happened when her pads brush directly over Dani’s bundle of nerves and Dani flinches.

“Did you…?”

Dani nods, panting.

“I’m sorry, I…” Dani drops back against the pillows and blinks her eyes open. Her face is flushed, her gaze hot with arousal and a hint of embarrassment. “It’s never happened like this. This- this quick. Not with… not even with myself. I don’t know what—”

Jamie presses her mouth to hers, kissing her hard and deep until Dani’s nervous stuttering is replaced by a tiny sound of pleasure.

“You need to stop that right now,” Jamie says once she pulls back, smiling and nuzzling at Dani’s cheek to make her meet her gaze. “It was amazing.” A hot shiver runs down her spine at the thought, the image of Dani coming under her fingers still burning in her mind. “How are you gonna apologize about that?”

“Because I… well, I just…”

“Came?”

Dani’s cheeks burn hotter and Jamie grins. She kisses her again, softly this time. They both sigh when Jamie pulls her hand from between Dani’s legs to rest it at the apex of her thigh, close to still-too-sensitive skin.

“I loved it.” 

She keeps it to that. She could tell Dani that watching her come so suddenly was one of the most intense, erotic moments of her life. That her own center is pulsing with the need for friction. That she needs to be touched but even more than that, she needs to touch Dani again, to make her cry out again.

She keeps that brazen truth to herself. There is too much vulnerability in Dani’s eyes already. She keeps it to herself and kisses her. She’ll never get tired of kissing her.

Their bodies come together naturally, a warm, soothing embrace as their lips glide with no rush. It’s a moment made of tenderness.

Tender, that’s what Jamie thinks she needs to be for Dani, after building her up to such a sharp high. Tender and caring as she gives Dani all the time she needs to recover.

But maybe she doesn’t need to be this tender. Maybe she doesn’t need all this time, because Dani does not settle in her arms. Dani, despite coming only moments ago, starts squirming beneath her, rocking lightly her hips against Jamie’s abdomen. 

Jamie is not sure Dani is fully aware of how her body is moving, but she is, painfully so. Dani’s skin is warm and damp, and feeling her move like that rekindles that liquid fire in her veins and belly.

She deepens the kiss, experimentally, and Dani whimpers into her mouth, gives a little jerk with her hips and Jamie is sure. 

She can be tender, and slow, and everything Dani needs her to be. Everything, even what Dani cannot or will not put into words, not after the hot sheepishness of her first release.

“You feel good, yeah?” she asks, withdrawing just enough to look at Dani. Dani nods, her brow scrunched in a little frown that makes Jamie smile.

“Good.”

She presses more kisses to Dani’s lips, to her jawline, her neck. Shivers ripple through Dani’s body with every kiss, Jamie needs so little to work her up again. She never really came down to begin with. 

As her fingers skim across Dani’s stomach and then lower, on the inside of her thigh, Dani finally catches up.

“Jamie.”

“Want me to stop?”

She brushes over wet cotton and Dani sighs. Jamie only needs a couple soft strokes for Dani to start pushing her hips low, chasing her touch.

“Do you?”

“No,” Dani whines, squeezing her eyes shut and biting her bottom lip. Jamie sucks it soothingly into her mouth.

There is a newfound hunger in Dani’s expression when Jamie suddenly pulls away and sits up on her knees. Before she can protest, Jamie curls her fingers around the line of her panties and stills. Waiting. Asking.

Dani looks at her with hooded eyes and lifts her hips off of the mattress, making it easy for Jamie to peel off her underwear. She takes off her own, too, completely soaked through, putting herself in the same state of vulnerability as Dani. And like her, Dani watches.

Her gaze scorches Jamie, skating over every inch of her body to settle with no shame between her legs. Jamie has never been shy, her life clawed out of her any instinct towards self-consciousness and fragility. But there is something absolutely nerve-racking about being on complete display before Dani like this. 

Her belly tightens, flutters. Her fingers shake lightly as she trails them up Dani’s leg.

They reach for each other at the same time. Dani sinks her fingers into Jamie’s hair and pulls her back into a kiss, presses her flush against her with an arm around her waist.

Heat spreads over their joined bodies, envelops them like a blanket. It’s everywhere, on their breath, their skin. Even with Dani’s tongue parting her lips, her hands pressing, stroking, Jamie wants to be closer.

She curls her fingers under the bend of Dani’s knee and pulls. Dani does the rest, hooking her leg over the small of Jamie’s back, and they both whimper. Hot, pulsing slickness pressed directly against Jamie’s thigh.

Jamie feels like an exposed nerve like this, raw and hyper-sensitive as she holds Dani and lets her grind against her leg. Dani is so lost in the feeling that she is not even kissing her anymore, her mouth open and slack against Jamie’s cheek, sighing, whining. 

Jamie would reach down and touch herself if it were anyone else. But anyone who’s not Dani would not leave her this shattered just from watching.

“Wanna touch you again,” she whispers.

Dani nods, jerking harder against her. Finds her focus enough to kiss Jamie again, imploring.

“Yes.”

Jamie adjusts herself on top of Dani, giving the arm holding her up a small bit of relief. 

Her hand replaces her thigh between Dani’s legs.

It’s as breathtaking as the first time. Dani’s warm sigh reaches Jamie’s flushed cheek as she slides her fingers through slick folds. Hands flex around her shoulder, a hot mouth searches hers.

Jamie isn’t as tentative as before, her touch is confident, going for spots she has discovered to be most sensitive, and her heart races as she watches Dani’s eyes flutter, struggle to stay open against the gentle waves of pleasure Jamie is spreading through her.

“Jamie––” Dani whimpers when Jamie traces the same tight circles that were her undoing before.

Jamie smiles and keeps her movements slow and persistent, indulging in a little selfishness because every tremble and gasp she draws from Dani goes straight to her core.

Dani is warm and pliant and restless beneath her, and everything about it feels _good_ , so good Jamie wants more of it.

She moves lower, wets the length of her fingers and circles gently around Dani’s entrance.

“Wait.”

Jamie freezes.

She pulls back to look at Dani and finds her with her eyes open, flushed and panting but with her brows knit together. Jame is surprised when she struggles to meet her gaze.

“What’s wrong?”

When Dani doesn’t answer, Jamie starts to withdraw, but Dani’s hand shoots up and grabs at her bicep.

“No, don’t.”

“You alright?”

Dani nods.

“Yes, yes. It’s just…” 

She closes her eyes and lets out a shaky breath. Jamie waits, as still as she physically can. It takes Dani a moment to open her eyes again, her gaze drenched with nervousness.

“I don’t…” She gulps, makes a visible effort not to look away from Jamie. Her voice drops down to a whisper. “I’m not sure I’m going to like that.”

Jamie lets the words sink in, relieved and saddened at once. She knows about Dani’s ex fiancé. Dani was sparse on the details, but she told her enough for Jamie to figure out that there was no one before him, and no one after. Only one person she was intimate with, one person who clearly didn’t make her happy.

Dani’s words leave no doubt about the nature of her sex life during her previous relationship, and yet Jamie knows she was with the guy for years. Her chest tightens at the thought. Trapped trying to be perfect for someone else to the point of ignoring her own needs, desires. Someone as good as Dani should have never experienced something like that.

Her hand is still between Dani’s legs, her fingers completely still against flesh she can feel throbbing. Jamie leans down and places a soft kiss on Dani’s lips. She wants her to stay present in her body, warm and safe from the rise of anxiety.

“Is it okay if I try?” Another gentle kiss when Dani’s eyes widen a little. “If you don’t like it, you just tell me and I’m gonna go back to what I was doing before.”

Jamie can see Dani’s mind racing, her eyes flickering as she considers the offer. She remains quiet at first. Then, after a moment, she gives a timid nod.

“Okay.”

“Yeah?” Jamie struggles to keep her excitement out of her voice. “You sure? ‘Cos if you don’t want me to, I can always—”

“I’m sure.” Dani nods again, more confident this time. There’s a rough, hot texture to her voice when she smiles and says, “Please.”

Jamie beams. She leans down again for a sucking kiss and lets Dani pull her closer. She drapes herself over her as their lips glide together, resumes the gentle stroke of her fingers once Dani tugs softly at her arm. 

The soft noise of pleasure she lets out in Jamie’s mouth is free from worry or nerves. It’s exactly what Jamie wanted. She is buzzing with how much her body needs some type of release. Not just her own, not exactly. She wants Dani to unlock completely.

She goes slow. Careful, like no one was with her when parts were inverted. She brushes against Dani’s entrance, dips the tip of her finger inside. Dani tenses instinctively, just for a moment. Her eyes meet Jamie’s, again that mix of want and tenderness that makes Jamie’s mind float.

She nods, neither can wait any longer. Their moans meld when Jamie slides inside.

That first, slow push is immediately overwhelming for both. The feeling makes them cave into each other, foreheads bumping and shaky breaths mingling. Jamie has to close her eyes for a moment. Dani is hot and snug and silky smooth and Jamie could stay inside her forever. 

“Okay?” she murmurs, feeling the sharp dig of Dani’s fingers into her back and at her waist. It’s all she can manage. Her body is shaken by a hot tremor when Dani clenches around her.

She opens her eyes and tilts her head back to look at Dani. Seeing her likes this, mouth rosy, eyes dark and wanting, hands gripping, sends Jamie deeper into a thick haze of need.

She moves slowly, slides out before slipping back in, almost no resistance at all. Dani’s face scrunches up and her lips part to try and suck in a stuttered breath. 

“Yes.” The answer to Jamie’s question finally arrives, gasped and whiny and accompanied by a hot palm grabbing the back of Jamie’s neck. “I–– _yes_.”

It makes Jamie smile and her eyes wonder, taking in as much of Dani as she can.

On the next push, that same hand around her nape pulls sharply, and Jamie almost loses her balance, falling into a heated kiss. Dani licks at her upper lip and then into her mouth, deep and heavy. 

She takes the pleasure Jamie is giving her with no restraint, moaning and rolling her hips and bending her leg to the side so Jamie can thrust with more ease, reach deeper.

It’s what Jamie had wanted since their first kiss, but not even in her hottest, most obscene, uncontrolled dreams, she could have imagined Dani like this. She could’ve never imagined to have to kiss Dani to muffle her moans and prevent the whole manor from hearing her.

Dani’s hand remains in Jamie’s hair even when they break apart to breathe, tugging and clenching and keeping Jamie’s face close enough that they share the same hot, thick air. When Jamie adds another finger to heighten the sensation, Dani gasps and her whole body tenses like a bowstring. 

A glint flashes through her eyes. Surprise, Jamie realizes. She barely catches sight of it before Dani closes her eyes and presses her head back against the pillow, exposing her neck and throat.

Her skin is flushed, beads of sweat trickle down the line of her tendons. It’s too big of a temptation, Jamie tastes the salty skin with her lips and tongue. She shifts to Dani’s collarbones, her breasts, everywhere her mouth can reach before moving back up and shushing Dani’s whimpers with another kiss.

Her fingers never stop.

She switches to a searching curl after long minutes of Dani twisting and trembling and letting out sounds that make Jamie want to rut against the mattress to get some desperately needed friction.

She might come with no friction at all, though, because the change turns Dani into a being of pure lust and need and makes her arch off the bed, gasping and almost sobbing out Jamie’s name.

“There–– I... fuck.”

“Christ, Dani…”

Jamie keeps her motion steady, determined. Even through the ache in her wrist, even when Dani’s fingernails scrape her shoulder blade hard enough to make her hiss. She adds her thumb, rubs at the top of Dani’s slit with each curl, slick down to her palm, and Dani folds into her.

Body locked, knee hitched up high and digging into Jamie’s ribs, mouth open silently. Her gaze meets Jamie’s for a moment and she tips over.

She mutes her cry with her teeth on Jamie’s shoulder, clenching over and over around her fingers, so hard Jamie can hardly move them. Dani’s body spasms, limbs jerk without any control, and Jamie can only hold her and ground her and prolong her pleasure as much as she can. 

Even she is dazzled by how long it goes on for. Dani shudders, pulses, cries out all through her orgasm, and coming untouched really doesn’t seem all that impossible to Jamie anymore.

She holds Dani until her exhausted body grows slack against her. She drops back against the mattress, boneless and panting. Jamie can still feel her twitch lightly around her fingers.

She is completely spent, and so so beautiful, mouth red and swollen, hair messy and sticking to sweat slicked skin, trembling softly. So beautiful that Jamie can barely stare at her, and at the same time doesn’t ever want to look away.

She carefully withdraws her hand and rests it over Dani’s hip, rubbing soothing circles over the jut of the bone.

“Hey,” Jamie smiles gently when Dani opens her eyes. Dani doesn’t say anything. She breathes deeply, takes a moment to focus again. Jamie’s smile stretches. “There you are.”

Dani blinks, the post-high daze still visible in her eyes. Her hand, soft and weak with the release of tension, traces a path up Jamie’s stomach, over her chest, curling her fingers at her collarbone. It’s a soft touch that makes Jamie shiver.

So, she isn’t ready when Dani grabs at her chain necklace and pulls her down to kiss her, so abruptly that Jamie has no clue how the chain doesn’t snap.

Jamie loses her balance under the sharp jerk and falls onto Dani, but the woman under her seems to hardly notice. She wraps her arms around her and kisses her harder, rolling them onto their side.

Jamie laughs into the kiss, taken aback and utterly amused by Dani’s eagerness. Dani kisses her with the type of urgency that demands for more closeness, even when impossible. Jamie lets her have it, keeps her mouth open under the insistent swipe of Dani’s lips and tongue.

They’re again out of breath when Dani finally pulls back.

“That was…”

“Yeah.”

“It’s never been like this. Is it always like this?”

Jamie smiles. She doesn’t feel smug, just happy. Utterly, ridiculously happy.

Dani pushes a hand through her blonde hair, slumps on her back with another deep exhale. She looks so content, sated, and Jamie feels drawn to her warmth. She curls against her side and kisses the soft curve of her shoulder, the arch of her neck. Her lips again, when Dani turns her head to look at her.

“You were so good,” Dani whispers, and Jamie would make a joke but Dani continues, “to me. Not just at… this.” She smiles bashfully. Timid, still. Even after what they just did. “You were so good to me. Thank you.”

Jamie’s heart throbs and swells in her chest. She feels a faint spark, a new emotion that she won’t name or express. She has known the fake, twisted version of it. This, this is different. More fragile. More powerful.

Too early to give it a name, to acknowledge it, even, for the sake of both. But Jamie’s always been a bad liar, especially with herself. And she knows it’s too late to pretend that spark isn’t flickering already.

Dani’s mouth is on hers again before Jamie can reply. The kiss is soft, but insistent. Jamie melts into it, goes without a fight when Dani rolls them over and settles on top of her. 

It’s a different type of heat the one that spreads over her as Dani kisses her and strokes softly at her side. Low, simmering, but not any less consuming. 

There is something absolutely intimate about it, Jamie thinks as Dani moves her lips to her jawline, about the way she can just close her eyes and simply _feel_ Dani like this. Her soft, solid weight on top of her, her lips at that ticklish spot under her ear, her hands exploring her. 

She goes soft beneath Dani, but her pulse ticks up and her breathing deepens, hips shifting, seeking relief for the heat between her legs. She doesn’t do it on purpose, but Dani is pressed right against her, her thigh rubbing with every little movement, and Jamie can’t help the soft moan that tumbles from her lips.

She feels a hand trace the curve of her breast, a gentle, definitely intentional squeeze.

“Dani.”

Her voice is husky, she can’t quite keep the trembling out of it. Dani’s hand squeezes again, her thumb brushes over her nipple and Jamie squirms.

Dani pulls herself up to look at her, casts a hot glance over Jamie’s body before meeting her gaze. Pupils blown, a glimmer of nerves and determination. Jamie knows what she wants to do without her having to utter a word, and her body grows alight with a surge of arousal.

“Y’know, you don’t have to.”

“I want to.”

Dani kisses her again, deeper when Jamie curls her fingers behind her neck. The hand on her breast slips lower, fingernails drag softly over her taut stomach, eliciting shivers and goosebumps in their wake.

She feels Dani’s hunger, her need, exuding from every quivering breath through wet lips. But Dani also touches her like she wants every touch to be right, like Jamie’s body deserves reverence, care. Dani is the one who never slept with a woman before, but this is a first for Jamie, too. She has never been touched like this.

“Guide me,” Dani whispers, and Jamie nods but she needs no guidance at all.

Dani kisses her neck, cups her breasts and puts her mouth on them, sucking each nipple. Drifts lower and her hair tickles the damp skin of Jamie’s chest. Never staying on one place, never long enough for Jamie to settle. 

Lips and fingers and teeth drag over her skin, make her feel like electricity is surging through her, and every drag is deserving of a sigh, a whimper.

Jamie is beyond caring how needy she sounds. 

She tugs at the back of Dani’s neck and at her shoulder. Tugs her up, urgently, because the sight of Dani’s head between her legs is too much to take in. Jamie sighs into a kiss, their bodies rub together. She is so sensitive that it might be enough. It really might be enough.

She is glad it’s not, because Dani’s hand slides between her legs. Fingers dip inside her and it is bliss.

Everything about it is slow, warm. Dani kisses and watches her as her fingers explore. Every new touch marked by a question, branding itself hot on Jamie’s skin.

_Like this?_

Jamie’s answer is always the same.

_Yes. Yes. Yes._

She is swaying, lost in molten pleasure that builds and builds to a peak that’s just out of reach, just enough to keep trapped between agony and ecstasy. She grabs hold of Dani’s arm, feels her bicep flex with every motion of her fingers. Pulls her closer, Dani’s palm presses tight against her, and then she is free-falling.

She never wants it to end, for a moment she isn’t sure it will.

When she comes back to her body and opens her eyes, Dani’s soft smile is the first thing she sees. She drapes that softness all over Jamie, her nose nuzzling her cheek, lips tracing hers. Jamie vaguely registers the words whispered against her shivering skin. She has never felt more alive.

That emotion comes back. Beautiful. Terrifying.

_Make it last_ , she prays. Her hands reach for Dani, keep her close as her heart hammers. _Please, make it last._

* * *

“Do you think they heard us?”

“You’d be the main culprit if they did.”

Dani nudges at her shoulder and Jamie laughs.

Outside the room, the moon hangs high in the sky. Scorching heat left the bed, replaced by the soothing warmth of the afterglow. It took them hours to get to this state, exhausted and sated. Jamie finds she is enamored with this serene aftermath just as much as with the passion that preceded it. 

More, maybe. It’s new for her, rarer.

“Don’t worry. This house’s too fucking big for anyone to hear anything.”

She props her head up on her hand and smiles down at Dani. She is lying next to her, the sheets covering her only up to her stomach. Jamie is spent, happily so, but she still feels a tingle in her stomach.

“Besides,” she continues, “if those two knew what’s good for them, they’d be in a room tryin’ to keep _us_ from hearing them.”

Dani chuckles, bites at her lip to keep the sound from turning into giggles.

“Do you think they ever will?”

“Dunno.” Jamie shrugs. “I sure hope so. Never seen two people more good and more perfect for each other.”

She breathes deeply, lets her mind run. “Can be scary, though.”

“What?”

“Feelings.”

Dani remains quiet. Her gaze is soft, still, but searching. What’s going unspoken is clear to both, but it’s too early. The mood isn’t spoiled but Jamie draws them away from that conversation, those feelings. The best thing she can do for both is to go slow.

She lets a mischievous grin build on her face.

“I’d pay big money to see Owen’s face after being caught slipping out of Hannah’s room.”

Dani’s brows shoot up and then a laugh bubbles up from her throat.

“Can you imagine?” Jamie laughs with her. “Poor lad’s mustache would fall off. So nice and shy, caught doin’ the walk of shame.”

“Stop,” Dani muffles her laugh with her mouth. “Poor Owen.”

“You’ve been here only for weeks. I’m the one who’s had to watch _years_ of those two dancing around each other without doing anything about it. I’m frustrated for them. At some point, go for it.”

“Like you did?”

Jamie blinks, surprised. Utterly amused. The cheeky smile on Dani’s face, the pleased glint in her eyes, it all makes the tingling in her stomach more insistent.

“Look at proper Dani Clayton being a tease. Want me wrapped around your finger, don’t you?”

Dani’s smile widens, grows more bashful. Her tongue slips over her bottom lip as she tugs it between her teeth.

“Is it working?”

Jamie kisses her. 

She curls over Dani and pushes her down, both laughing into the messy kiss.

Jamie feels light when she draws back to lie again next to Dani. She wouldn’t be able to stop smiling even if she wanted to. This type of happiness is new to her, she doesn’t quite know what to do with it.

She knows what she wants but she isn’t sure if it’s something she’s allowed to indulge in.

“I, uh…” She clears her throat, chuckling to mask her nerves. “I’m not used to this. Sticking around afterwards.”

She realizes she phrased herself in the shittiest way possible the moment Dani’s smile falters.

“Oh. I’m sorry, I didn’t realize—”

“No, no,” Jamie rushes to stop Dani. “Didn’t mean it that way. S’my fault, I said it wrong.”

Dani’s body loses some of the tension that had spiked up in response to Jamie’s words, but she isn’t quite as relaxed as she was a moment ago. Her eyes are fixed on Jamie, kind but questioning.

“What I’m sayin’ is,” Jamie chews on her lip, tries to find the right words after failing so spectacularly the first time, “I’d get it. If you wanted me to leave.”

She sighs, hating the trembling hitch of her voice. She can count on one hand the times she spent the night with a woman after sex. It’s the first time she has wanted it this bad, so bad that she thinks she might cry if Dani asks her to go.

But she would, if that was better for Dani, if that was what she wanted.

“I mean, with the kids and everything, I know you care a lot about that. And I don’t wanna be a bother, or a… a complication. Y’know, it’s—”

She is shushed by a soft kiss.

Jamie unfurls like a loose knot, sighs in relief against Dani’s lips. Dani doesn’t let her go for a long time, her kisses are gentle and languid and melt away any concern still lurking deep within Jamie.

They are both blushing when they finally pull away.

“I don’t want you to leave,” Dani says. “I want you to stay here. And I wanna wake up to you tomorrow. There’s no other way I want this to go.” She clenches her jaw, lets out a low breath. Her voice is more hesitant when she says, “If that’s what you want, too.”

Jamie smiles, a toothy grin that grows, grows. She keeps smiling even as she kisses Dani again. The happiness she feels doesn’t fit in her body.

They doze off entangled, faces brushing close, sharing the same pillow.

A ray of moonlight to her eye awakens Jamie at some point through the night. She blinks slowly, eyelids heavy. She feels warm, in the type of way that will lull her back to sleep in a matter of moments.

Through this pleasant haze, she notices that she has shifted. 

She has turned on her side, facing the window that woke her. It’s in that moment that she realizes where the warmth comes from.

Dani, curled around her, her chest to her back. She has wrapped an arm around Jamie’s waist, Jamie can feel its soft weight even without looking.

Her breathing deepens, just slightly so. She makes no attempt to move, no attempt to pull away from that cocoon of warmth and safety.

_Safe_ , she thinks, as Dani’s lips against her neck lure her back to sleep. It’s what she feels, maybe for the first time in her life.

Safe.


End file.
